A Girl Dork and a Guinea Pig walked into a Bar

Porn Tweezer

Mon, 29 Oct 2007 01:35:54 GMT

Pork Butt

Tue, 18 Sep 2007 23:22:18 GMT

Can someone please explain to me what is so appealing about eating something called "pork butt"?

Smush

Sun, 16 Sep 2007 15:25:37 GMT

I am Smushie sitting this week. In addition to living with him, I still have my house to take care of and my stupid job to go to. Each time I leave the house, poor Smush looks like the most pathetic creature known to man. His tail droops...his eyes droop...I can just hear him, "Pleeeeeeeeezzzzzzzeeeeeeeeee don't leeeeeeeeeeeeaaavvveeeeee meeeeeeeeee."

Yet, every time I return, I open the door and there he is...jumping up and down, wagging his little tail, spinning around in circles, giving kisses. I *heart* him and he *hearts* me!

Work woes...

Sun, 16 Sep 2007 02:57:11 GMT

I completely and thoroughly want to gouge out the eyes of my jerk boss and the jerk my boss hired two months ago. I am so fed up with them I could vomit.

My job

Fri, 24 Aug 2007 15:32:37 GMT

SUCKS

I'm a pet bird

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 19:39:06 GMT

I'm bored working at the county fair. This is just yet ANOTHER reason I hate my job and life. So I'm taking all sorts of stupid quizzes. The scary thing is, this one pretty accurate.

You Would Be a Pet Bird

You're intelligent and witty, yet surprisingly low maintenance.
You charm people easily, and they usually love you a lot more than you love them.
You resent anyone who tries to own or control you. You refuse to be fenced in.

Why you would make a great pet: You're very smart and entertaining

Why you would make a bad pet: You're not interested in being anyone's pet!

What you would love about being a bird: Flying, obviously

What you would hate about being a bird: Being caged

What Kind of Pet Would You Be?

Annoyed Tweezer

Thu, 19 Jul 2007 16:27:13 GMT

Boids

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 21:26:03 GMT

Meh...

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 22:34:14 GMT

So Gizmo is doing remarkably well. He is snuggled in his blanky here because he was shivering cold (he hates getting his hair cut).

He has gained tons of weight (he is quite the fatty again). He is eating almost every meal and is bouncing around like he owns the place again. Who knows what was wrong with him. Either nothing was wrong and he just hated his food (my parents switched foods), or the herbs from the acupuncturist work. I don't care what was wrong. He is pretty much back to normal now. Thanks to everyone for their wonderful thoughts. I truly do appreciate it.

I'm finished for the week at work...yes, it is only Monday afternoon. This week is going to SUCK in the boredom department. I've received more rejection letters for more jobs. Trying my hardest to not become bitter but it doesn't seem to be working.

Oh...I quit smoking :) I had my last cigarette around 11:00PM on July 3, 2007. I'm doing fairly well with it too. Some days are better than others, but I've not had a single puff. I'm proud of me. My four month gift (don't ask why four months) will be a Wii :)

Thank you so much artisticalias for the nudge. I truly appreciate it.

#33: Big Stone Gap by Adriana Trigiani

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 22:48:43 GMT

Date Finished: 5/16/2007
Pages: 269
Category: Fiction
Rated: A
Cover: Quality Paperback
From: bookcrossing rabck
Reason for Reading: desire

I've heard many good things about this book and they were all true. It was a great read. I can't wait to read the others in the series!

From the Publisher
It's 1978, and Ave Maria Mulligan is the thirty-five-year-old self-proclaimed spinster of Big Stone Gap, a sleepy hamlet in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. She's also the local pharmacist, the co-captain of the Rescue Squad, and the director of The Trail of the Lonesome Pine, the town's long-running Outdoor Drama. Ave Maria is content with her life of doing errands and negotiating small details-until she discovers a skeleton in her family's formerly tidy closet that completely unravels her quiet, conventional life. Suddenly, she finds herself juggling two marriage proposals, conducting a no-holds-barred family feud, planning a life-changing journey to the Old Country, and helping her best friend, the high-school band director, design a halftime show to dazzle Elizabeth Taylor, the violet-eyed Hollywood movie star who's coming through town on a campaign stump with her husband, senatorial candidate John Warner.

Filled with big-time eccentrics and small-town shenanigans, Big Stone Gap is a jewel box of original characters, including sexpot Bookmobile librarian Iva Lou Wade; Fleeta Mullins, the chain-smoking pharmacy cashier with a penchant for professional wrestling; the dashing visionary Theodore Tipton; Elmo Gaspar, the snake-handling preacher; Jack MacChesney, a coal-mining bachelor looking for true love; and Pearl Grimes, a shy mountain girl on the verge of a miraculous transformation.

Comic and compassionate, Big Stone Gap is is the story of a woman who thinks life has passed her by, only to learn that the best is yet to come.

#26: The House that Stood Still by A.E. van Vogt

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 21:33:17 GMT

Date Finished: 5/2/2007
Pages: 159
Category: science fiction
Rated: B
Cover: paperback
From: rob
Reason for Reading: desire

An interesting story. At times it just seemed to drone on and on with exposition (which I hate), but other than that, I truly enjoyed it. Who wouldn't love immortality without having to suck the blood of your friends? Simply go to the house that stood still, and immortality shall be yours!

Gizmo update

Fri, 25 May 2007 04:10:26 GMT

Thanks to everyone for their thoughts. I truly appreciate it. Gizmo is now taking herbs from the acupuncturist *giggle* and it seems to be helping. I went on vacation for a week and he feels like he has gained some weight :) Yay Gizmo!!! He is still droopy and gets tired easily, but he has shown interest in his "babies" and will carry them around sometimes. He doesn't really play with them, but he does still love on them. And he is eating most of the time again. My heart is much lighter.

For some reason, all of a sudden, I can't send picture posts to my account from my phone :( I have no clue why and no clue how to fix it either. It is driving me bonkers.

My best friend Gizmo

Sat, 12 May 2007 03:34:04 GMT

This is Gizmo Smushie Face. He became my little brother and best friend 10-1/2 years ago. Today, he was diagnosed today with kidney failure. I don't know how bad it is because I didn't really get to discuss it with my parents as they have guests in town. My father says Gizmo is going to die. I can't breathe. He gets to go home tomorrow so I will go see him tomorrow. Hopefully I can get some answers tomorrow as well. Research has told me that it can be treated if caught soon enough. I hope it is soon enough. No one thought Tweezer would live and that was two years ago. She takes medicine daily, but I forced her to live. I will force Gizmo to live too.

Please send good thoughts to Gizmo.

I'm ready...

Tue, 01 May 2007 21:31:51 GMT

to quit. Just run away from everything and never return. But Tweezer would die so I can't.

Happy Birthday to Meeee

Thu, 19 Apr 2007 02:12:07 GMT

I had one of the best birthdays I've ever had.

The tiara is from the coffee shop where I typically eat lunch. I walked in and was looking for a table and Peggy (the owner's mother) directed me to the "reserved" table. On the table was a birthday card and that tiara (along with some very sparkly clip on earrings!). I put the tiara on and felt like quite the dork, but it was too much fun.

They also paid for our lunch! After we ate, they brought out homemade cheesecake!!! My slice had a candle on it :) One of the owner's was walking around giving everyone free cheesecake telling them it was my birthday. Eating my cheesecake, I still looked like a total dork in the tiara, but I had soooo much fun.

Then my parents had cupcakes, cookies, and ice cream for me for dinner. I ate way way way too much sugar yesterday but you gotta have fun, right?

I got an awesome book on the Five Mafia Families of New York, a hello kitty desk set (yippee), some really cute, unique candle holders, a soup mug (and I've been wanting one for a while!), and an amazon.com gift certificate :)

Today I realized how lucky and blessed I truly am.

#19: Hot Stuff by Janet Evanovich and Leanne Banks

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 17:26:27 GMT

Date Finished: 4/14/2007
Pages: 281
Category: chick lit
Rated: A
Cover: Paperback
From: gift from momma
Reason for Reading: desire

I think this has been my favorite one yet (of the non-numbered ones). Evanovich's writing always makes me wish I were the characters in the book. After reading this book, I'm totally in love with Kellen and Beast...even Pugg! Non-stop laughter. I now have a horrible desire to run out and get myself a cute little mastiff! I've never read anything by Leanne Banks, but after reading this, I would like to try some of hers.

The Barnes & Noble Review from Heart to Heart
Bestselling authors Janet Evanovich and Leanne Banks deliver pure nonstop fun in this romping romantic comedy that has as its center of gravity a 120-pound bull mastiff named Beast. Talk about your shaggy-dog story!

Evanovich and Banks start out with an appealing cast. There's Cate Madigan, age 26, the only unmarried one in a large family. She bartends by night, attends college by day, and likes to make cakes. She saves money by sharing an apartment with Marty Longfellow, a South End drag queen, who performs at the bar. At the end of the bar, looking mysterious, is Kellen McBride -- a mysterious, dark-haired guy at the end of the bar! No wonder her friends in the building call him Mr. Tall, Dark, and Yummy -- or Mr. Yummy, for short. He's an investigator, specializing in retrieving lost property.

Then the plot starts to bubble. Once Kellen sees Cate, he becomes determined to finesse himself into her life. Marty bolts for Aruba after receiving numerous mysterious calls, or so the note says. Was he ever involved in stealing jewelry? Beast, the young bull mastiff, is delivered to Cate after Marty's disappearance as a gift from Marty. Cate's apartment is broken into twice, and then there's the dead guy. After an evening of breaking and entering (and dinner with the unruly Madigan family), Mr. Yummy is well and truly hooked. Now they need to solve the mystery. There are some great secondary characters here, including the memorable Pugg, plus Cate's girlfriends Julie and Sharon, and the mysterious Mr. M in 2B, who may or may not be involved. Ginger Curwen

#18: SAHM I Am by Meredith Efken

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 16:44:40 GMT

Date Finished: 4/13/2007
Pages: 325
Category: Fiction
Rated: A
Cover: Paperback
From: library
Reason for Reading: desire

Absolutely hysterical. But I think I'm going OT here *snicker* I have become obsessed with epistolary novels. They are so much fun. This one had many moments where I found myself actually laughing out loud. I'm not a SAHM and still enjoyed it. What cracked me up the most perhaps would be every time the moderator had a fight with her sister, that would become the TOTW! *giggle* Anyone who has ever belonged to some email group needs to read this. It is too funny.

For the members of a stay-at-home-moms' e-mail loop, lunch with friends is a sandwich in front of the computer. But where else could they discuss things like . . .

Success: Her workaholic husband is driving Dulcie Huckleberry around the bend. It's hard to love someone in sickness and in health when he's never home!

Art: Let the children express themselves, opines artistic Zelia Muzuwa, and then her son's head gets stuck inside a kitty scratching post . . .

Health: Surely aches and pains are normal in an active little boy, yet those of soccer-mom Jocelyn Millard's son don't seem to be going away.

Motherhood: Teen-mom-turned-farmer's-wife Brenna Lindberg can deal with the mud and the chickens, but what about her husband's desire for a child of his own?

Indiscretions: However youthful, they can come back to haunt you, learns pastor's wife Phyllis Lorimer.

Amends: These could stand to be made between officious list moderator Rosalyn Ebberly and her pampered sister, Veronica. Perhaps the other SAHM I AMers can teach these two something about sisterhood.

Publishers Weekly
Can a novel consisting entirely of e-mails be enjoyable faith fiction? Efken's charming, light debut offers a resounding and surprising "yes." Several stay-at-home moms (the "SAHM" of the title) from across the country become friends and confidantes through an e-mail chat group. Rosalyn Ebberly is the self-righteous moderator (her prov31woman@home.com e-mail address is a tip-off) who, although exaggerated, will be recognizable to anyone who has ever regularly attended church. Some mothers rebel against her judgmental and self-glorifying e-mails by starting a subversive alternative e-mail loop, humorously dubbed "Green Eggs and Ham." The problems they chat about are familiar: the unfortunately named Dulcie Huckleberry is frustrated by her husband's long absences on business; Zelia Muzuwa is an artist whose creative home-schooling isn't going over well with her more structured husband; Phyllis Lorimer is a pastor's wife dealing with a demanding congregation. The flow between e-mails is surprisingly smooth, and the characters well developed through their correspondence. Efken keeps the mood light, although she's not afraid to tackle serious topics such as infertility, marital difficulties and chronic illness. Christian readers will savor this fresh entree and likely want to start e-mail loops of their own. (Oct.) Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.

#17: You are so Cursed! by Naomi Nash

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 16:29:37 GMT

Date Finished: 4/12/2007
Pages: 198
Category: Fiction / YA
Rated: B
Cover: Paperback
From: library
Reason for Reading: desire

This is a very cute book and a must read for anyone on the "outside." Vick's coping mechanism, I thought, was fairly healthy (other than the lying part of course LOL). I was moved from school to school and had problems making friends so I could relate. I only wish when I was in high school, I knew magic LOL

From the Publisher
High school's a dog-eat-dog world, but Vickie Marotti has an edge. Scorned by the jocks and cheerleaders? Misunderstood by the uptight vice principal? No problem. Not when you're an adept street magician, hexing bullies who dare harass you or your outcast friends! But then cute and popular upperclassman Gio Carson recognizes the truth: Vick's no more a witch than she is class president. Her dark curses are nothing more than smoke and mirrors. Will he tell the world, or will it be their little secret? Vick is about to learn a valuable lesson: that real magic lies in knowing your true friends.

KLIATT - Sherri Ginsberg This book perfectly describes an alienated teenager in the hostile environment of high school. There are cliques everywhere and Vickie Marotti, known as Vick, does not fit into any of the groups. So from having moved around a lot, she has devised a personality that works for her. Vick becomes a special outcast. She is a feared witch with special powers. By using magic tricks, she portrays herself as someone to be feared. She attracts a small following that appears to worship her, and she in turn protects them from all the misfortunes of the world. Vick's act is running smoothly along until a new boy comes and recognizes her talents. He's a cute and popular upperclassman and respects her skills. It's an old story, of teenagers mistreating their fellow students and everyone trying to peacefully co-exist in a threatening environment. This tale is perfect for library shelves. KLIATT Codes: JS—Recommended for junior and senior high school students. 2004, Dorchester , 198p., Ages 12 to 18.

Picture Post

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 01:33:00 GMT

#16: ttfn by lauren myracle

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 23:20:10 GMT

Date Finished: 4/10/2007
Pages: 240
Category: Fiction / YA
Rated: B
Cover: Paperback
From: library
Reason for Reading: desire

ttfn, is just as cute as ttyl. I was able to relate to this one much more though. I, too, was forced to move during my junior year of high school. It sucked. I'm still bitter. At least Angela was able to move back to her "home." Our library doesn't have l8r, g8r but I do want to finish the series.

Told entirely in instant messages, this sequel to the hugely popular ttyl follows Maddie, Zoe, and Angela through the new flirtations, fixations, and frustrations of eleventh grade.

Angela has just found out that her family is moving to El Cerrito, California, and she seriously doesn't know how she'll survive without her best friends. Maddie makes some really bad moves with Clive, a pot-smoking hipster who wants to be "friends with benefits." And Zoe finds herself falling for Doug, the sweet poet who has had a crush on Angela forever - a crush that Angela has come to count on.

The paperback is timed to release a month before the latest installment in the series, l8r, g8r. Together, the three books about the winsome threesome are a funny, touching chronicle of the rocky road of real friendship - bumpy, nutty, and marshmallow-sweet.

Kissable

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 17:55:16 GMT

I'm in such a piss poor mood today I've turned to taking stupid ass quizzes *sigh*

Your Famous Movie Kiss is from Cruel Intentions

"I'm the only girl you can't have, and it kills you."

What Famous Movie Kiss Are You?

i love

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 01:17:57 GMT

that my family will never see me as anything other than a junkie

#15: ttyl by lauren myracle

Sun, 08 Apr 2007 23:58:20 GMT

Date Finished: 4/8/2007
Pages: 209
Category: Fiction / YA
Rated: B
Cover: Paperback
From: library
Reason for Reading: desire

Very cute. At least I thought so. Adult reviews I've read seem to think this book will be the downfall of society. I say whatevs to them. I wasn't expecting anything when I got this book other than a book written in IM conversation. I liked the style and the format. It was fun and interesting. Is it destined to be a classic? I don't think so. But taken in context for what it is, it is cute. I'm glad I read it.

Publishers Weekly
Myracle's (Kissing Kate) approach is creative, even if her newest novel is somewhat formulaic: three best friends hash out their lives-from new relationships to conflicts with one another-through instant messages. As they start 10th grade, social Angela catches her new boyfriend on a date with another girl; tough Maddie is befriended, then humiliated, by a popular girl; and "good little Zoe" finds herself crushing on a teacher-who seems to be interested in her, too. Though the main characters and the plotting seem familiar, readers will appreciate Myracle's portrayal of the supportive friends: they listen to one another, plan a surprise party and a road trip, and when Maddie is low, Angela and Zoe make her a care package with a poem that Angela calls "mushy but not 2 mushy." Their messages at times contain too much plotting to seem like realistic chats, but the style makes for an engaging, quick read. Flourishes such as emoticons and Internet lingo add realism; the book's title translates to "talk to you later," and Angela adds stage direction to her messages, writing "*stomps foot*" (when she believes Maddie is withholding information) or "*jumps up and down and squeals*" (when Zoe promises her a makeover). As might be expected, there is a falling-out among the friends. But while Maddie's reaction when she catches Angela and Zoe discussing her behind her back seems too extreme, readers will cheer their reunion, which happens just as Zoe's teacher makes his move. Ages 13-17. (Apr.) Copyright 2004 Reed Business Information.

From the Publisher
An epistolary novel for the 21st century, this sharp, funny, and true-to-life breakout hit about friendship is told entirely in instant messages. And Internet-savvy teens have fallen in love with flirty Angela (SnowAngel), moody Maddie (mad maddie), and good girl Zoe (zoegirl) and their frank perceptions about a tumultuous tenth-grade semester. Now perfectly priced for its audience, the paperback is being released alongside Myracle's brand-new hardcover novel, Rhymes with Witches.

#14: Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult

Sun, 08 Apr 2007 20:41:05 GMT

Date Finished: 4/8/2007
Pages: 455
Category: Fiction
Rated: B
Cover: Hardback
From: Jamie
Reason for Reading: desire

Perhaps I'm hard-hearted, but to me, this book just did not live up to the hype. This was my first Picoult book and I just don't see what the deal is. It was a good book, yes, but not one that has me thinking about my life and wondering. I can barely remember character names at this point. Many have claimed this is her best yet. I hope not. I won't let this stop me from reading her other books...but I hope they are better.

That being said, I do appreciate how she wrote the book from varying view points. And it was a good story line. It just didn't really move me or motivate me much. The ending didn't thrill me either. It was too clean and too perfect for what was a very imperfect town.

From the Publisher (bn.com)
In nineteen minutes, you can mow the front lawn, color your hair, watch a third of a hockey game. In nineteen minutes, you can bake scones or get a tooth filled by a dentist; you can fold laundry for a family of five....In nineteen minutes, you can stop the world, or you can just jump off it.

In nineteen minutes, you can get revenge.

Sterling is a small, ordinary New Hampshire town where nothing ever happens — until the day its complacency is shattered by a shocking act of violence. In the aftermath, the town's residents must not only seek justice in order to begin healing but also come to terms with the role they played in the tragedy. For them, the lines between truth and fiction, right and wrong, insider and outsider have been obscured forever. Josie Cormier, the teenage daughter of the judge sitting on the case, could be the state's best witness, but she can't remember what happened in front of her own eyes. And as the trial progresses, fault lines between the high school and the adult community begin to show, destroying the closest of friendships and families.

Nineteen Minutes is New York Times bestselling author Jodi Picoult's most raw, honest, and important novel yet. Told with the straightforward style for which she has become known, it asks simple questions that have no easy answers: Can your own child become a mystery to you? What does it mean to be different in our society? Is it ever okay for a victim to strike back? And who — if anyone — has the right to judge someone else?

Today

Fri, 06 Apr 2007 01:13:22 GMT

I went to the grocery store and spent $50 *sigh* I did get healthy foods and of course I forgot a few things because I don't understand the concept of a list. Plus it was a spur of the moment trip because I didn't want to go tomorrow LOL Now, I'm going to have to go SOMETIME this weekend *vomit* to get the few things I forgot...grrrr.

I got home and unloaded everything. By then it was six. DDR takes forever to do 30 minutes so I thought I'd try Yoga Booty Ballet. OMGOMGOMG It just about killed me and I only did about 15 minutes of it LOL However, the 15 minutes that I did were a blast! So, I'm going to keep at it and hopefully my stamina will improve.

Overall, today was a good day. Work was a typical probation day. Stupid LOL. I talked to Kim today about the theatre and had a nice rant session for about 30 minutes (too bad that doesn't count as cardio). It was nice talking with her anyway as I hadn't seen her in about a year or so.

And now I'm getting ready to have a nice enjoyable evening watching Survivor and reading.